Throughout my journey with this blog, there have been lots of changes in my life, lots of unknowns, lots of tears, and lots of joy. I have seen the grace of God over my life, and there has been more than enough growth to go around. Despite it being the hardest year and a half of my life, I felt God closer than ever.
Yet if I’m completely honest, in the past three or four months I have felt distant, and God has seemed awfully quiet.
I just moved all by myself to a new city (don’t grow up; adulting is hard) and there has quite literally been lots of silence in my life that I don’t always know what to do with. And finally, the silence has gotten my attention in a different way; not every single season with God is “loud”.
Quiet time with God would normally mean daily devotions, but this new quiet time I’m experiencing is literally that: quiet… maybe even boring or mundane. I don’t know about you, but I don’t feel satisfied when things are silent. Waiting around in silence is not fun, and sometimes we Christians don’t talk about these apathetic times enough. Maybe because we want to look perfect, or maybe we just wish we cared.
So maybe your silent season doesn’t make sense, but how are we supposed to believe that silence is golden? Here are some of my own answers to that very question:
It’s a chance to remember that God is enough. We can see He’s enough when He has to be. We don’t always give God the room to be all we need when other priorities occupy our hearts. But Jesus is truly all we need; we never return without our needs met with him (John 6:35). It is enough that He died on the cross for us; we don’t need a circumstantial reason to praise or thank him.
It’s a chance to be alone with Him. How often do we truly have no noise? There are always things screaming for our attention, and we don’t have to look hard or long to find them. But silent times can be our biggest opportunity to experience the fullness of God in a deeper way. This earth and everything in it will fail you and I, but allow God to be your portion (Psalm 73:26; Isaiah 43:2).
It’s a chance to be active and not passive. We are used to multitasking everyday. But for some reason, we let this change when it comes to God. Allow waiting on God can be intentional and proactive; seek after God when it’s hard. (Jeremiah 29:12-13; James 4:8).
It’s a chance to use your other senses. So you can’t hear God right now. Maybe it takes leaning in a little closer to hear a whisper. In the meantime, use your eyes and mouth. Start to look for God in all the things you do. See the good things in your life, and then say them with a thankful heart. Yes, I do mean allowing your physical eyes to work hand-in-hand with your spiritual eyes. And yes, sometimes it does mean speaking out in faith. (1 Samuel 12:16; Psalm 34:8; Job 42:5).
As I wrote these very things down for myself in my journal, I noticed a reoccurring word that you might have noticed as well: chance.
Yes, I have the chance to do all of these things. Seeing this silence as an opportunity to serve Him in a deeper way will completely change the outlook I have toward God during this time. But we have to make a choice to see the chance, or we will wade the waters of apathy.
Choosing the better option is something that has clashed our human nature since the beginning of humanity. But I promise, God loves to give grace through this. We have permission to mess up and try again because it’s all covered. No, not to abuse the grace we have, but to find our way to loving God more. I desire to be close to this God we serve, and I will resolve to do it when it’s hard and the atmosphere is silent. I will vow to use my eyes when my ears need help, and to use my mouth to speak God’s promises when I haven’t seen them yet. He is faithful and true. We can stand on this.